Maya Gwynn
With KVCR Public Media, I'm Maya Gwynn with Black Perspectives IE, a show we learn about the amazing things members of the black community are doing in the Inland Empire. My guest today is Ryan Berryman, Founder of SB Fatherhood. Thank you so much for being here.
Ryan Berryman
Thank you. It's a pleasure to be here. It's honor, matter of fact, for the invite.
Maya Gwynn
Your mission at SB Fatherhood is to enhance the engagement of fathers by promoting a culture of father inclusion and responsible fatherhood in communities. Which leads into my first question. Your organization focuses on father inclusion, which I really like. What does that look like in practice, and how have your own experiences as a father shaped the way your organization's mission has come to be?
Ryan Berryman
First of all, my background is working in social services and Children Family Services. After the first 10 years, I recognized there's a lack of resources and services for fathers. And so therefore I kind of, within the system, looked at others who felt the same need, trying to reach out and develop other resources that would be able to include fathers through research, as well as spiritually. It's always been identified that families are better, more solid, healthier and stronger when both mom and dads are working together for the best interest of children and establish a generation for future children. Also with myself, I have two children. My oldest is 46 and youngest is 41. There's a lot of things that I've learned as a father, both good and bad, and learning from the bad as well as from the good.
Maya Gwynn
What's a way that you address the stigma or societal barriers that often discourage men, especially men of color, from seeking help, seeking community, or showing vulnerability as fathers. I feel like we're getting better talking about mental health, but we still have a long ways to go.
Ryan Berryman
Stigma, stigma... you know, one of the things is building trust, especially African American men. Historically, families in the black community have been separated, yeah, when you look at slavery, even the social service systems tend to separate, cause a division between men and women, especially our black men, and so creating an environment of trust with our men, with our organization. A simple example is originally we were San Bernardino Fatherhood legally. And so recently, I changed the name to SB Fatherhood because I don't want individuals I work with to have the understanding I'm with the system. I want them to be able to come in feeling free, feeling safe, feeling that this organization can accept them where they're at and that we can build upon the trusting relationship with men. Also looking at the importance of community, helping community debts, helping community and building up on that for the benefit of strengthening men, individually, strengthening families, as well as strengthening our communities for future generations.
Maya Gwynn
Yeah, this is actually a question that came from my father, because I told him about this organization. He thought it was really amazing. For individuals who don't have a positive role model growing up, or maybe their father wasn't in the same house as them, but maybe just their personalities are different. How does SB Fatherhood step in to fill that gap?
Ryan Berryman
Yeah, one of the things we encourage within our organization is the importance of helping one another as men. So even if a father isn't there, being able to learn from that - reason why he wasn't there, so he can become a better individual from those experiences, so he can benefit his own children and also being able to learn the positive from other men. Sometimes, you know some negative things may have happened in our lives, but look at it as a learning experience.
Maya Gwynn
How do partnerships with schools, community organizations and community meetups that you guys have advance your mission, and which systems or spaces do you still see need further inclusion?
Ryan Berryman
One of the things I really encourage is collaborating with individuals who are like-minded, not just presenting lip service, but where are they willing to give? And look at the longevity of connecting fathers, supporting fathers, helping them not to take anything away from moms, women. We need women in the fatherhood community, because women help support the whole agenda of strengthening fathers and strengthening families and strengthening communities. So we need them so individuals who are like-minded, similar beliefs, similar values, similar purpose, whether it's systems, whether it's churches, whether it's other organizations, having those organizations and agencies be like-minded.
Maya Gwynn
Like-minded in their mission?
Ryan Berryman
Absolutely.
Maya Gwynn
From what I've heard and it was pointed out to me, and then I started to notice the trend - that it's really true many parenting resources often speak to fathers in a way that can feel condescending. How does SB Fatherhood approach supporting fathers while respecting their dignity. Like, for example, I saw on your website, which is amazing, you guys are promoting maternal health and supporting infant care. In what way do you guys do that that still respects the dignity of both parents?
Ryan Berryman
Yeah, one of the things we recognize in the program that we have is boot camps. Boot camp for new dads, and that we received a grant through two organizations, two hospitals, and that program is dad supporting maternal health and infant care. So what we have is this environment, a space where they encourage fathers to gain information, knowledge from other fathers and their experience and supporting mom and caring for babies. So in that particular space, which is a one day workshop for three hours, we provide an environment where there's dads who've already had their baby, maybe up to six months, three months, and they're providing information to dads who have not had their baby, and these dads who've already had their baby, they're just giving their experience, whether it has to do with the hospital stay, changing diapers, perinatal mood anxiety with mom, some things they went through. Who are their support systems in that environment? What safe sleep looked like, Shaken Baby, you know, finding ways to care for baby without causing any damage to the baby, just being real, and it's an opportunity where dads obtain information from other dads in a supportive, non-judgmental and safe environment.
Maya Gwynn
So we're going to move to our rapid-fire portion. I'm excited to hear your answers. If your work had a theme song, what would it be?
Ryan Berryman
Save the Children, Marvin Gaye.
Maya Gwynn
Okay, I love that song. If you had to teach a master class or give a TED talk on a random skill you have besides the work that you already do, what would it be?
Ryan Berryman
It would probably be something like, it's a curriculum that I've been wanting to present, and it's called Understanding Dads for Moms.
Maya Gwynn
Okay, what is your favorite IE restaurant or landmark that reminds you of the Inland Empire?
Ryan Berryman
One of the regional parks. I go to regional parks. I like to fish. Now they have swimming areas and things like that. So, San Bernardino County Regional Park.
Maya Gwynn
And how can people keep up with you and support the work that you're doing?
Ryan Berryman
SBfatherhood.com, that's our website. Also on social media, Facebook, Instagram. Also just email us and catch on to our email list and know of all the upcoming events. We have annual events throughout the year. Right now we are having our International Men's Day, which is November 19. In the month of March, we'll be having our annual daddy daughter dance. Look forward to having that at the Orange Show. So we have a number of events throughout the year, so just go on SBfatherhood.com and you'll see all our events along with our monthly boot camp for new dads workshop.
Maya Gwynn
Awesome. Thank you so much for being here, Ryan. I really appreciate this conversation.
Ryan Berryman
Thank you.
Maya Gwynn
Of course. Ryan Berryman is founder of SP Fatherhood. Find this segment and others at kvcrnews.org/bpie. Support for this segment comes from the Black Equity Fund at IECF, advancing racial equity and supporting long term investments and black led organizations in Riverside and San Bernardino counties. Join us again next week for Black Perspectives IE. For KVCR Public Media, I'm Maya Gwynn. Thank you.
